Monday, September 19, 2005

League of Exceptional Gentlemen

November 16th 1898

Welcome to another edition of 'Bizarre Adventures'! This previous week on 'the League of Exceptional Gentlemen' we saw The Doctor (played by Stephan Hillman/Tom Baker), one day after solving the case of Weng Chiang, at the British Secret Service office where he was directed by Campion Bond to assemble a new League to solve a dire case for Britannia!

The Doctor's new assistant, a very young Secret Service Assistant Coordinator Alfred Pennyworth, escorted him to a seedy shack near the London docks where the met up with a sailor by the name of Wolf Larson (played by Michael Ruch), whose rumors of him being deceased were clearly underrated.

The trio then ventured out into the countryside to meet up with a scientist of highest repose named Professor Edward Challenger (acting provided by the austere Carlton Quick). The rotund Professor gladly joined the troupe to research for Queen and Country!

Rushing back to London they meet their newest, and most reluctant, member named Adrian Montague (who is really a Mr. Connor Macleod incognito/portrayed by Mr. Forrest Oates). Mr. Montague agrees to participate only after Mr. Pennyworth produces a strange folder with information about his past... all the way to the 1500's! And what is that symbol on the folder... and is that a similar symbol on Mr. Pennyworth's arm?

Returning to H.Q. the team meet their final member, a haughty Mary Poppins (acted by the gentle Mrs. Nancy Oates) was speaking to Mr. Bond.

Bond then, the League being complete, escorted the lot down to the museum proper where 10 gurneys were aligned with bodies. The figures were murdered faerie folk (leprechauns, centaurs, mermaids, and the like) all stabbed fatally and found, one a day, all about London. Even more mysterious was a single gold key found on each of the bodies.

After investigating these murders, the League found that near each of the murders there was a patch of earth that seemed to be enchanted! Such mystery in only their first hour of being formed! Upon returning to the MI5 H.Q. what was there to greet them but a NEW MURDER? This murder, a satyr, was even more brutal than the rest. His golden key smelled of sea-salt. A London Bobby, wounded when called to duty by our culprit, stated that this character fled down a corridor and... up.

The next morning, Miss. Poppins took hold of her key and detected that it felt a 'drawing sensation' towards the docks. The group followed on foot and stopped at a small cabin that was surrounded by a patch of land that was curiously in the shape of a sailing vessel! Mr. Pennyworth tried to divert their advance, but was ignored.

Announcing their arrival, a dark figure invited them into his cabin. Looking like a down-on-his-luck one-armed shanty sailor this mysterious figure was quite the proper British gentleman. He stated that he was expecting the group after hearing of the murders. "We have been planning to set a trap for the culprit ourselves," he stated plainly, "but now that you lot are here we can have your aid."

"Whom do you speak of?" Mr. Montague asked quizzically.

The gentleman motioned and was joined by mystical creatures emerging from the shadows. "Do not be afraid, they are my friends. I am their protector, but I have not been doing so good a job."

"And, whom might you be, good sir?" asked Mr. Challenger.

After a draw upon his long pipe the chap answered, "Nelson. Horatio Nelson of her Majesty's service."

"A-Admiral Nelson?" Mr. Larson stuttered.

"The same." was his reply.

Stay tuned for partial excitement!